Pasha (31): Recovering From Depression, Bi-adventures, and Networking
Pasha is 31, he lives between Nizhny Novgorod and Moscow. For Pasha, Pure has been useful both professionally and personally. He’s got stories for us: one time he fell in love with a couple, another time arranged a blind date and even met a current colleague on the app. That's right: we’ll never get tired of telling you that Pure is what you make it. No limits here.
Depression left the chat
I was born in Severodvinsk and lived there until I was 25: got married, then divorced - and finally left. Now I live between two cities: Nizhny Novgorod and Moscow. I started using Pure two years ago when my post-divorce depression started to subside and I felt I was ready to date again. Since then, Pure has been a staple on my phone and becomes relevant periodically - I stop logging on when I get into relationships.
PURE — EVERYTHING HAPPENS HERE AND NOW!
Networking
Pure has been useful to me in more ways than just dating. To be honest, I’ve met a lot of my current clients on the app. I do consulting: I wouldn’t say I’m a fan of these words, but I am a mentor and coach: I help develop and grow businesses, projects, teams.
This wasn’t intentional — everything somehow happens naturally, and I have no idea how. People often tell me that I have a cool Ad, we start chatting back and forth and discussing our jobs, and then - you guessed it: "Oh, that’s so cool, tell me more!". The rest is history.
The percentage of interesting people on Pure is close to 85%
Good evening, colleague
My very first Pure date turned out to be the strangest date I’ve ever been on. I met up with a girl, she had some curls in her photos. I didn't really know who she was or what she looked like. We had a little small talk and agreed to meet up. On our first date we ended up talking about work the whole night. Fast forward to now: we’ve been colleagues for two years! Cooperating, consulting together, and transferring orders to each other. The most “intimate” thing that ever happened between us was discussing our exes and some dating basics on that first night. So far, this has been my most stable Pure connection.
In general, based on my experience with dating apps, it seems to me that Pure has grown into a communicative platform with some kind of a built-in "filter": all the boring people stay on Tinder, and the interesting ones are on Pure. Don't know, maybe I'm just lucky, but the percentage of interesting people I’ve met on Pure is somewhere around 85%. Of course, there are chats that get deleted almost immediately. But in general, I don't remember a single unpleasant experience. Most people here are intelligent and nice to connect with.
Immersive Date
At some point I got bored of dating. There was a feeling of my dating life turning into Groundhog Day. So, I came up with an experiment that could help me feel excited about dating again: a date in reverse, let's say, with an opposite chronology. The girl and I didn't know anything about each other, we just exchanged a couple of sentences. We agreed to meet up in an open exhibition space with visual installations. We said "hey" to each other, climbed onto this dark balcony behind the exhibition, and tried to get to know each other via touch: hand on hand, face to face. It turned out to be such an immersive experience: how interesting is it to feel someone without knowing them? The sensations were fascinating. Then we left the public space and took it all the way. When we were done, we were like “Hey, I’m Anna” — “And I'm Pasha, nice to meet you”.
It’s like a movie shot: they are standing there, hugging and kissing, and I realize that I’m super upset - I wanted to stay
Didn't want to leave
I’ve got a fun story about falling in love with a couple. I don’t even know who I liked more: him or her. Usually, everyone is pretty shy in this regard, but they sent me a picture and said: "Come over, there’s two of us." It was tempting - they were so persuasive and open. I thought there was some sort of a catch there! I had no clue things could be so simple. They just wanted to have some threesome or even get into an ethically non-monogamous relationship.
An hour of excitement and hesitation — and I'm on my way. I was met by this beautiful, really nice girl:
- And where’s the guy?
- He’s in the shower, come on in!
He came out of the shower. Word after word, we’re all getting comfortable and starting the fun. There were some funny moments where he would leave me alone with the girl: "Do whatever you want." So, we did. He would then come back, sit down next to me and watch us. At some point, I caught myself watching him admire her: he just sighed and observed how cool she was in action.
Then it’s time to go home. I get dressed, look around — and it’s like a movie shot: they are standing there, hugging and kissing, and I realize that I’m super upset. I wanted to stay. I went back to my place. I was sniffing my shirt for like three days afterward, thinking about that night full of bi-curiosity.
For me Pure is…
The coolest thing about Pure is…
Openness, honesty. At least, I try to broadcast it myself. Well, the design.
Your most successful ad?
I’ve only had one - I don’t really change it. In addition to the main things about me, it says: "I have my boundaries and will respect yours."
What is the first thing you tell about yourself?
I try to start with a compliment, to show curiosity. I rarely talk about myself - usually, everything is in the ad.
What’s not a good topic for your very first chat?
There is no such topic.
What are some fantasies you’ve managed to realize with someone from Pure?
Emotional-immersive themes, scenarios that can be played from the point of view of emotions. I don’t think there’s something I’m yet to realize that’s a “necessity”.
What’s something you’ve never tried and won’t try?
Something like getting offered to have a foot up my back entrance - definitely not.
In a potential partner, you are most attracted to…
Internally - intelligence, externally - facial expressions.
You will never date someone who…
Demands something right away or makes me feel like I owe them.
A piece of advice for someone who just downloaded the app?
Think carefully about your ad. Girls have often complained to me that a lot of male Pure ads are terrifying.
