What Does ONS Mean in 2022? Definition & Pros
“That’s totally wrong, ugly, unladylike” — everybody has an opinion on how people should act in personal life, relationships, and, of course, sex. Olga Nechaeva, the founder of the "Femosofia" platform, talks about what an ONS (or One Night Stand) is and how we look at one-night stands in 2022. Spoiler alert: it's more common than you would think.
In simple terms, what is ONS?
ONS is short for a one-night stand. However, here are some real-life examples and facts about how ONS on a dating site becomes a reality.
"I know, We slept together, but I can't really remember when, where, or to be fair — who it was," is something I've heard more than once in the funny, silly, and passionate stories that girls share during brunch; In those rare moments when they can open up about their private lives, Women are 10% more likely than men to express regret over casual sex. However, this could imply that 65% have no complaints.
How the culture denies ONS
Just as Coco Chanel can make an outfit out of practically anything, we can make anything out of sex: a tragedy, a romance, perhaps a comedy, or even a horror story. Some will say that "you can't build a relationship from jumping to bed on the first date"; "If you agree to have sex right away, a man will lose interest" — women's magazines are full of advice on how to manipulate your way into a highly desired "serious relationship." There's an underlying assumption that a self-respecting woman cannot like a meaningless casual ONS.
I don't believe that I am the only woman in the world who is put off by the "woman needs a deep emotional connection," "woman seeks a serious relationship" stigma.
Tell me what you think about sex, and I'll tell you what your psychological needs are
ONS is about women's needs, too
We have five fundamental emotional needs that are equally as important as water, food, and sleep. One of them is the desire for intimacy, affection, and a secure connection with another person. It's why we get together, fall asleep in each other's arms, learn about each other's childhood, get married, and name our children.
We need spontaneity, play, and freedom. It hides our love of novelty and adventure, flirtation, playfulness, excitement, and spontaneity. Without this need, we become walking stuffy nerds and shame about humanity. It adds sparkle to our eyes, gives a better mood, and adds spring to our steps so we can be wild, free, and ready.
Will an ONS work for you?
If we have an unfulfilled need for our soul mate, looking for them at One Night Stand is often a lost cause (there are, however, there can be exceptions). But, on the other hand, if your soul seeks adventure, then letting go of all the rules and principles is the best thing you can do to discover the true you.
Pros of a one-night stand
What does "I'm seeing him for the first and last time" mean to you?
- You are not required to keep your distance, to impress, or to lay the groundwork for a relationship.
- You can be yourself, try new things, and ask for whatever you want openly.
- You can try out things you wouldn't say to your significant other and play any role you want.
- You can say "no" and "yes" without hesitation, without fear of resentment or a mythical "sense of duty".
- You can kiss first, say "let's go to your place," and then silently pack up and leave right after, without bothering to explain in the morning.
- You could let go of control and trust your body without thinking. You can have the best orgasm in the world or laugh it off together if things don't go the way you intended them to.
- You can spend the night with someone "totally wrong for you" — and then the following day be wise and all-around decent again.
Something that isn’t a part of your routine will often appear to be this bright, one-of-a-kind experience. So why are one-night stands looked down upon? Is it written somewhere that good sex can exist in the comfort of your home with a loved one? Good Girls Go to Heaven, but Bad Girls Go Everywhere! Try to make room for everything: pure love and tenderness, as well as the joy of being playful.
Do you enjoy mysterious acronyms as much as we do? Then we suggest you read this piece about FWB.